The Covid-19 Taskforce of the Wildlife Health Organisation



The following short story was the consequence of a walk in the countryside near my home during the coronavirus lockdown. I stopped to take a photograph of a grassy knoll with this year's lambs enjoying a spell of sunshine. As the sheep watched me with interest it got me wondering what the animals would be thinking of our current situation if they were capable of having thoughts about such matters. After all, I reckoned they have a lot of experience that they could bring to bear on our current predicament.


The Covid-19 Taskforce of the Wildlife Health Organisation

The Covid-19 Taskforce of the Wildlife Health Organisation (WHO) was in session. Mr Badger peered over the frame of his thick-lensed spectacles, tilted his snout in the air and gave a short but audible sniff before beginning, “As you are aware the human population has been infected by a new and dangerous virus that is spreading out of control. At present there is no cure and no effective treatment.”
“There is also evidence that this disease may have the ability to infect other species,” added Mrs Cow ruminating on the matter. “Apparently a tiger in a New York zoo caught it from an asymptomatic keeper.”
“The scientific evidence is a bit wooly and inconclusive,” proffered Ms Lamb rather tentatively.
“That’s not really the point,” argued Mr Badger haughtily, sliding his glasses up his long snout in an effort to assume an air of even more importance. “The lack of scientific evidence must not prevent us from taking difficult decisions.
“I blame the immigrants,” said Mr Squirrel twitching the tufts on the tips of his tall red ears. He placed his small hands in front of him, made a series of clicking noises and lifted his bushy, auburn tail straight up and almost over his head. “I have seen first hand the devastation that occurs when immigrants are allowed to take over one’s country and breed indiscriminately. Not only do they bring in viruses to which you have no natural immunity but the next thing you known is that you are in the minority in your own land.” Mrs Cow moved her gaze slowly around the gathering, “My ancestors came from Jersey many years ago but I think it’s fair to say that we are now naturalised. I’m with Mr Squirrel on this one, It’s the new immigrants you have to beware of.”
“Clearly the humans have taken their eye off the ball with this disease,” said Ms Lamb, her black face looking uncomfortable after the conversation about immigrants. “With our personal experience of diseases coupled with our knowledge of usual human behaviour in the face of such viruses surely we can lead the way in helping them resolve this challenging situation.”
“I couldn’t agree more," said Mr Badger, adopting a rather commanding posture and a voice of firm authority. “Clearly the humans need help and we can assist by adopting their approach to similar problems in the animal kingdom previously.” He removed his glasses and cast a hovering glance at each member of the assembled congregation in turn, then added, “Are we agreed?”
“Agreed,” said Mr Squirrel.
“Agreed,” said Ms Lamb
“Agreed,” said Mrs Cow.
“Then we are all agreed,” said Mr Badger. “We have no option but to cull them.”
“How?” queried Ms Lamb, somewhat sheepishly.
“We will shoot them,” confirmed Mr Badger.
“And burn them in huge pits,” added Mrs Cow.



Articles and photography copyright of Tom Langlands

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